This is definitely one of the longest in between posts I've had, and for that I apologize. I just want to say that it hit me. So many things hit my mind during this absence of blogging. I seriously don't know where to start but I guess I'll try and start from where I left off.
So I basically left my last post by saying I was going to make 2011 a big year, on my own, and be productive to start off I honestly wasn't. Just reading the last paragraph I remember the person and thought process I once had, and what my thought process is now...Amazing how about 75 days or so can alter your mind set. You see this all goes back to when I was in high school, I was close to God and in obedience with my parents, and doing things under Gods wisdom. He promised me in the bible I will give you more than you dream about, I dreamed about realistically at the time to get a full scholarship to a division 1 program in the country. God blessed me with a professional soccer contract! What a blessing right?? See the things with blessings is how you use them, I used mine incorrectly. I thought once I signed that contract I could do things on my own, and it made me believe so more, when girls put me on a pedastool, I had money for a kid my age, had a nice whip, and basically was "living a dream". But as old saying goes, easy come easy go. And just like that my dream was snatched away from me a year and a half in. When your being paid bi weekly for playing, not really working you think money will never stop coming in. You think girls will never stop calling, you think friends will not stop inviting you to clubs, you think all these things. But just as quickly as they came when you were what you felt was on top, they leave even quicker. Friends abandon you, girls won't call as much or anymore, money is at short, and all those things that you used to think filled you up, really leave you empty and thinking "Damn I wasted my time". But see time is never wasted, when you sleep your body is recovering so there a plus in that time "wasting" period, sort of a silver lining so to speak. So what's the silver lining on this one, is that I learned and realized I can't do things in my own strength, and people are as fake as they seem. I'm blessed to have learned these personal experiences at the ripe young age of 20.
So to be straight up about my soccer career, I can't really blame anyone but myself this is the first time I publicly take this blame. I spent more time partying then training, I spent more time kicking it with girls, then kicking balls, I spent more time learning about Miami's nightlife & girls then about learning the game of soccer. I let all those things get to me, and that's a recipe for failure and it proved it self when it happened. I don't regret it, cause I think sometimes you need to fail to realize certain things, and only with failure would I have been able to realize these things.
My relationship with God has grown immensly over the past month. I have gone to a spiritual retreat, participated in bible study groups, testimonial speakings', and a decipleship. I'm so blessed to have so many people that truly just simply care for me as a person, not for the person I am or my personal status. I just really have to thank my family, and friends who have supported me through my tough times.
Where I'm at now? Living back at home in Miami kicking it..Training really hard on my own in hopes of a second opportunity from God to play professional soccer, I tried simply training with my former team Miami FC now known as Fort Lauderdale Strikers, and they denied me. I was quite shocked to be honest, but that's fine. I love doubters, and trust in God 100% that he'll play me once I'm ready. I don't plan on living a double life anymore, as in doing drugs, then looking down upon those that do it, partying so often, looking for girls, sex, and that type of nightlife fun as an outlet. I will instead look to God for that now. I'm also finally enrolled in university it's being paid for and I'm currently attending Keiser University but it's a pretty expensive private university and I plan on switching schools. I tried seeing if I can go back to NCAA to play soccer, but unfortunately I can't, although I can still play in NIAA I don't think I will. I'm studying for a business administrator degree, in hopes of getting that and taking over the family business which I've spoken so highly of. That pretty much wraps it up, I'd like to thank those who have continued to stay in my life through my tough times, and didn't perish, and for those who are moving with me to a better future. I'm blessed in such a large amount that I've never even counted that high. I love you God, and thank you all for reading sorry for my hiatus, I'm back and will hopefully be regularly blogging AT LEAST once a week. By the way I haven't proofread this so sorry for any mistakes in advance!
-God bless!
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